Get Ready For Your Big Day With Tips From An Expert
By Deborah Welky
Having conceptualized their wedding day ever since seeing Disney’s Cinderella, many soon-to-be brides have everything already planned, down to the glass slippers. So why hire a wedding planner? The reasons are many but, most importantly, a wedding planner knows about everything that’s new and exciting, and can save you money. To get the inside track, we spoke with professional wedding planner Jennifer Hardiman, chief event officer (CEO) at Fabuluxe Events.
Q: When’s the best time for couples to announce their engagement?
A: After they have told immediate family. Then it’s OK to announce it on social media.
You don’t want family members to find out about your engagement via Facebook.
Q: How should you choose your wedding date, and when?
A: The couple should examine their calendars, decide what time of year they want to get married, then think about how long they’ll have to plan. While holiday weekends sound like a great idea for out-of-town guests, sometimes travel expenses are higher and could cost a premium at your venue. It’s ideal to have at least six months to plan a wedding. However, we have planned entire weddings in less than six weeks.
Q: When setting their wedding budget, what should couples keep in mind?
A: Everyone has a budget. Most vendors will work with you as long as you are honest with them as to what you can afford. If they can’t do what you want within your budget, they will tell you. It is important to remember little things like postage, alterations, accessories, printing and frames for signage, favors, gifts for the wedding party, cute things that you see when browsing Etsy — all those things add up, and suddenly your budget is busted. Be very specific when putting together your budget. From the beginning, talk with both families and confirm who’s paying. There is nothing worse than a miscommunication regarding money during wedding planning.
Q: Why should couples consider hiring a planner?
A: There are so many reasons. A planner can help guide you through the process, help you stay on budget, recommend vendors, review contracts, keep the design on track, help guide where to splurge and where to save money, prioritize costs and navigate the emotional stresses. In addition, on the actual wedding day, planners keep vendors organized and the day flowing. We allow the couple and their families to be guests at the wedding. These are once-in-a-lifetime moments, and we don’t want any of them to be missed. There are so many unseen things that planners do at every wedding… we sew on buttons and repair ripped seams, make sure everyone eats and stays hydrated. In our experiences, we have re-curled bridesmaids’ hair, gone to McDonald’s to get food for the littlest guests and so much more. The key is that a planner takes care of any hiccups before the couple ever finds out they’ve happened.
Q: What’s the best way to compile a guest list?
A: First find out how many people your venue holds and figure the cost per person. Then you know how many guest you can afford to have at your wedding. Start with immediate family and friends, then progress to those who may be work associates, etc. Don’t invite more people than you can afford. Especially in South Florida, you could be surprised at how many out-of-town guests whom you don’t expect will come to the wedding.
Q: How should you choose and when should you reserve the venue for your reception?
A: The venue should be one the first things you reserve. But do your homework before setting appointments to see venues. Make sure it is in a location you want and is the style you want (country club, hotel, beach, barn). Then look at their web sites and Facebook/Instagram pages. Then you can narrow it down to the top three that you want to visit.
Q: How soon should you choose your bridal attendants?
A: It’s not a requirement to choose attendants right after you get engaged. Take some time; think about any siblings from both sides who need to be included, then think about friends to be included. Within a month of getting engaged, you should ask those people to be part of the bridal party.
Q: When is the best time for a bride to start shopping for her wedding gown?
A: A bride should start shopping for her wedding gown at least eight to 10 months prior to the wedding. Some designers can take up to six months for the dress to be made to the bride’s measurements and shipped. It is important to leave enough time for alterations and fittings. It’s also important not to bring too many people dress shopping. There will be too many opinions, and it can cause stress for the bride. Bring the people who are closest to you.
Q: When should the bride select her attendants’ gowns, and who should be involved in that decision?
A: The bride should be involved and should have the attendants try on different fits and styles. Not everyone has the same body type. It’s OK to let the bridesmaids wear different styles of the same color dress. It is more important for them to feel comfortable and confident.
Q: How should the couple choose a theme for the wedding and reception?
A: I always tell our couples to be true to who they are when choosing anything related to their wedding, and that goes for theme or colors. There is a lot of pressure these days to create a Pinterest-worthy wedding. And themes tend to go along with your venue’s decor. It is all tied together. If there is not a theme (Tuscany inspired, Paris inspired, vintage, modern chic, etc.) that fits your personalities, don’t force it. Go with the colors you like and little touches of yourselves throughout the décor.
Q: How important is the selection of food and entertainment?
A: Two things people remember are, “Was the food good?” and “Did we have fun?” Food and beverages are key to creating the right atmosphere and tone for the entire reception.
Q: What is the best way for couples to research photographers, videographers, florists and cake-bakers? When should contracts with them be signed?
A: The internet is a great place to start. Look at Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest to get a sense of the style of the vendor. But word-of-mouth and recommendations by other people in the industry are invaluable. This is where a wedding planner can help tremendously. Planners know the personalities of the vendors and their price points, and can help you find the right fit. It is always good to interview at least one or two people in each category. You want to like the people you are working with. In some cases, such as photography and videography, the couple will be with them for up to 12 hours on the wedding day.
Q: When should honeymoon planning start?
A: Though traditionally this was left up to the groom, now it is more a joint project between the bride and the groom. Planning should start approximately six months ahead of the wedding, if possible. This way the couple can choose a destination and save money to pay for the honeymoon.
Q: What are the latest trends in wedding rings, and when should rings be purchased?
A: For grooms, there are many more choices than expected. Grooms can get a ring made of silicone, wood and metal, tungsten, stainless steel, gold or platinum. For the ladies, the ring should complement the engagement ring. Stacked wedding bands, conflict-free diamonds, colored stones, mixed metals… all are great options. Rings should be purchased with plenty of time for appropriate sizing and engraving — at least two or three months prior to the wedding day.
Q: When should the couple select wedding invitations? When should they be sent?
A: It is nice to send a save-the-date announcement to everyone on the guest list as soon as you have the date, location and guest list finalized. But make sure everyone who gets the announcement is getting an invitation! Then, about six months prior to the wedding, start working on invitations. Custom invitations take longer to produce than invitations from some of the popular web sites, and if you want hand calligraphy on the envelopes, factor in the time that takes. Invitations should be mailed eight to 12 weeks prior to the wedding, with an RSVP due 30 days prior to the wedding.
Q: How far in advance of the wedding should couples register for gifts?
A: The couple should register three to six months prior to the wedding and before any wedding showers. Couples today are registering for everything from housewares to funds for their honeymoon. Registries can be combined on sites like www.myregistry.com.
Q: What about the bride’s hair and makeup? Should the bride do a dry run before her big day?
A: Absolutely, yes. Bridal makeup is much different than everyday makeup. The bride should try it out with the makeup artist. It is a great way to get to know the artist. The bride shouldn’t be afraid to ask for a different shade of lipstick or less dramatic eyes during the trial. It may feel like the bride has on a lot more makeup than normal, but in pictures, she’ll look perfect.
Q: Is it better for the couple to select all their own music or to leave it up to the band or DJ?
A: The couple should choose some of pieces of music, then trust their band or DJ for the rest. For example, the couple should pick their processional, recessional, first dance and parent dances. But it can be OK to let the band or DJ pick the songs for things that may not be as important to the couple. Give the band/DJ the types of music that the couple wants played and their favorite artists. Then the band/DJ can see what is working with the crowd, keep the dance floor full and ensure a good time.
Q: What is your advice for couples who want to select readings and write their own wedding vows?
A: Start early and practice. When writing your own vows, you want them to truly explain how you feel about your fiancé. They should be heartfelt, but not too long. And not too many inside jokes… no one else will understand them. For readings, it is important to review them with your officiant to make sure they are appropriate for the ceremony.
Q: How soon should the groom’s family plan the rehearsal dinner and make reservations?
A: Tradition suggests that all members of the wedding party, their spouses and significant others, and out-of-town guests should be invited to the rehearsal dinner. But the trend recently has been toward smaller dinners and then meeting up with out-of-town guests for a welcome party or cocktails at a local hotspot. This is also tied to budget. If the budget allows for a larger gathering, then great. If a smaller, more intimate gathering is what the couple wants, that’s fine, too. But at least two or three months prior to the wedding, this should be finalized.
Q: Do you recommend securing a limousine, antique car, horse and carriage or other wedding-day transportation? Are there pitfalls? And what about transportation for the parents?
A: I definitely recommend transportation for the wedding couple, wedding party and parents at a minimum. This way everyone arrives on time and at the same time. I also recommend transportation for guests via a trolley or bus. This helps reduce drinking and driving. For the wedding couple, an antique car as they are leaving the church or at the end of the reception is fantastic. It also gives the couple a few moments alone to just enjoy each other. We have also worked with Uber and created wedding discount codes and provided that information to the guests so they can easily get from place to place.
Q: When it comes to gifts for the attendants, do you suggest traditional or lighthearted gifts?
A: This is all about personality — the personalities of the attendants, the wedding couple and their relationship with the attendants. No matter what the type of gift, it should be meaningful and not just because it’s the trendy thing to do.
Q: When does the couple need to get their marriage license?
A: A marriage license in Florida is good for 60 days after it is issued. I recommend going to get the license a few weeks prior to the wedding. If the couple is coming from out-of-state, they can get the license as soon as they arrive in Florida. There is no waiting period for out-of-state residents.
Q: Traditionally, the night before the wedding is when bachelor and bachelorette parties are held. Today, a combined party is often hosted. What are your recommendations on this?
A: Definitely not the night before the wedding! The night before the wedding, everyone should get plenty of rest and stay hydrated. I recommend planning a night out about a month before. Combined parties can be a lot of fun, or the couple can start the night separately and then have everyone end up at the same location later.
